Breakdown of a relationship can undoubtedly overwhelm an individual’s emotional, physical and mental well-being. The effect can be more distressing when there are children involved as, in addition to the separating parents, the mental health of the children is at stake. The constant anxiety and worry can linger for a lengthy period after separation thereby making your focus, health and overall wellbeing progressively worse. While you can feel like you are losing yourself in these difficult times, it is crucial to develop a game plan to assist in improving your own and your children’s welfare. Below, we have outlined some recommendations that, in our opinion, can assist you in encouraging healing from the effects of divorce and in simplifying the process of separation:
Get Personal Help
Though not an easy task, it is essential that you take steps to recover and get yourself back up from the inevitable and heavy emotions resulting from your separation. Getting personal help is one of the first steps you should undertake to ensure you are in control of your emotions and that your emotions are not getting the best of you. This includes:
– speaking to a trusted family member or friend about your feelings and worries
– being available for your children and making them feel safe and secure
– forming and following a daily routine to maintain focus
– practicing self-care and maintaining good hygiene
– engaging in existing hobbies and cultivating new ones
– ensuring you are keeping yourself well hydrated and eating a healthy diet
– setting time aside for exercising
– establishing healthy resting and sleeping habits
– allocating time to the things or activities that provide happiness
Get Professional Help
Despite practicing the above recommendations, you may still feel as if your life has come at a standstill. The state of uncertainty, confusion and anger about your present and future can push you into a deep hole and you may not know how to get back up. This is a cue for you to seek professional help. This includes:
– seeking medical help to address feelings of sadness and depression
– seeing a mental health counselor/therapist to:
1. Address the what, where, when and how of divorce and its effect on you
2. Address behavioral concerns
3. Develop coping strategies for overcoming the negative emotions of divorce
4. Manage stress and anxiety
Get Legal Help
Navigating the legal domain concerning separation and divorce can be challenging as well as intimidating for some. You may not be certain of what your rights and obligations are with respect to the effects of separation. For example, you may not know: whether you are entitled to spousal support and child support; whether you can continue living in the family home; whether you can restrict your spouse from seeing the children; and the list continues.
Speaking to a lawyer who is well acquainted in the field can make you feel at ease and can take some burden off of your shoulders. They are akin to a legal guide to help you identify your rights, obligations and provide the legal framework and advice on the steps to proceed with your family matter.
Even if you are not be in a financial position to seek the services of a lawyer, you should spend some time to explore any free or low-cost legal services that may be available in your area. In British Columbia, for example, if you have a low income, you may qualify for Legal Aid BC’s free legal services including access to legal information, legal advice and legal representation. Besides the free legal services, retaining a junior lawyer may assist you with your finances as their hourly rate is generally lower than those lawyers that are highly experienced. Some law firms also provide junior lawyers with supervision and mentorship that they may require in a given case for getting the best results for your case. At Connect Family Law, for example, our junior lawyers are provided with frequent legal mentorship and lawyer meetings which helps them get input and advice from senior lawyers on a particular matter.
We are here to Help!
We, at Connect Family Law, would be pleased to discuss any specific legal concerns you may have with respect your separation and divorce.